You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I am mentally ready for anal.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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