I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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