YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize