I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Randomize