do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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