OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
