My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
