So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
