using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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