I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
