So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
