these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize