Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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