OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Randomize