what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
