you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I need water and some morals
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize
