with your own penis?
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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