i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I skipped work to stalk him.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
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