Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
