Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
