What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
