he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
