I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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