Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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