You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Randomize