I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize