my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
i will never coherently bang her
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
