when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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