I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
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