Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
you didnt know i had herpes?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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