k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
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