In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
