so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize