if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
