We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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