you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
whose ass print is on the piano?
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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