When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
