you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
