In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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