It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
