oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
