white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
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