yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
