Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
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