I am in a vortex of obligation.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
