I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize