I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
You need Xanax blowdarts
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Randomize
