somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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