I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
so let's talk penis.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
