Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
