You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Randomize