I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
